My first year with NBA League Pass has brought me the joy of local broadcasts. I’ve heard so many absurd, illogical, non-sensical and down right random remarks that sometimes I wonder if they’re watching the same game as I am, or even a basketball game at all. I understand that announcing a basketball game is an incredibly challenging task and I don’t presume that I could do better than any of the professionals. Still, for the sake of posterity the good of all humanity these ridiculous affronts to clarity and the English language should be cataloged. Here’s a few of the choice nuggets I’ve collected so far:
- “And the Pacers continue to come up with dry heaves from the outside.”
– Bob Rathbun, referring to a missed three pointer by Brandon Rush, 12/11/10 IND vs. ATL
- “That is so money by Dirk, just BOOM in your glass!”
– Mark Followill, after a Dirk Nowitzki fall-away, 3/4/11 IND vs. DAL
- “He continues to spray good perimeter shots . . . right down the center!”
– Clark Kellog, referring to a made three pointer by Brandon Rush, 12/8/10 IND vs. MIL
This is a project that simply can’t be done alone and thus I’m putting out a call for help. If you are watching a game and hear something you believe should be a part of this compilation, send it along to me via email (Levy2725@gmail.com) or twitter ( @HickoryHigh). Please try and include the date, the announcer, the teams involved and if necessary a short sentence setting up the context. All the appropriate submissions will be available here at Hickory High on the Library of Inanisms page.